Work_2

Getting back to work has been hard. Really hard. My concentration levels are the same as they were in September. It's hard for me to concentrate and easy to get distracted with anything. 

I don't want to leave my house so being at college it's hard and it's something that I fight everyday again. Everyday I have to fight the urge to stay at home. The urge to make excuses to not go to college. But I make the effort and I leave home. 

But working has been hard. I noticed during the weeks I stayed at home that my concentration was worse but I didn't notice that it was like this. I forget what I was doing after 10 minutes and I've been realizing that I forget conversations or part of conversations with people. Things that I would remember before. Not important things but little bits of stuff that I would listen and would memorize. No I don't. I keep remembering the conversations I had to check if something important was said during them. If something in my routine is changed it takes a lot for me to remember. The last thing I can remember that happened was my bass class. It was changed from Tuesday to Friday and I kept forgetting the new hour. And this Tuesday I have two hours of bass and I don't remember at what time it is. And I used to be so good with this. I had my agenda in my head. And even if something changed I new exactly to when. Now I don't and it's scary. 

Regarding work I'm trying to do a weekly plan and stick by it. To see if this way I can start to have a work routine. Something I had before going to England. In my opinion, if I start to have this routine maybe I can start working better. One problem that I have is that if I'm working and I get distracted it takes me a lot of time to start working again. And as I'm easily distracted it's hard to focus on work. It's hard to not do anything else or not talk to someone. And everything is so much more attractive than working. 

I really hope that I can start working again. At least more productively than now. And if I start working I'm hoping that I can concentrate while doing other things like reading. But one step at a time! Baby steps.