Moving on

I'm making and effort to move on with my life! I think that I'm getting better at it and that's one of the reasons both doctors think I'm getting better and better (even though I'm not that sure!). 

I've been trying to meet new people, new people that could help me make me feel better in Porto and help me build new memories there. They don't need to be better memories, just different memories. And maybe that way I can start loving Porto again. I'm making an effort in interact with my colleagues in music classes, to make new friends. 

I know everything only depends on me. And I'm really trying to change things. I feel more "free" now. I feel like a weight has left my shoulder. I still don't know if this is because of the antidepressant or because of me. Because I changed the way I was thinking and I'm starting to make plans again and to live my life. Maybe it doesn't have to be because of one or the other. Maybe it's both working together. That's why I'm a little scared of stopping the antidepressant. I'm scared that when I stop taking it I'll go back to the way I was in September/October. And I really don't want that. I don't want to be in the dark tunnel again and I'm going to do everything I can to not return to that place. Now that I see the light I just want to stay in this path and work on everything that can help me get to the light and leave the tunnel. 

I'm going to try to keep moving on with my life. I want to! I want to live my life and not let it pass. I'm not getting younger and I have some plans for my future so I'm just going to let myself stay in this path that seems to be taking me out of the tunnel.