Looking back...

Sometimes I look back and I wonder if I could have avoided all of this. Maybe if I was more careful none of this would have happened the way it did. But if I was more careful I wouldn't be living my life. I would just be sitting and watching the time go by. I took chances, I took risks. Sometimes they pay off sometimes they don't. Just because mine didn't pay off it doesn't mean that they'll never pay off. It just means I have to keep trying, to keep living. It scares me most of the times honestly. I'm hurt, I still have in mind what can happen if the risk you take goes wrong but I can't let that overpower me. I need to be strong and to try again. If I fall I'll get up as I'm going to get up this time. It's been more difficult but I'm sure I'm going to get up and I'm going to do it all again. What is life if you don't try? 

Maybe I just need a little push sometimes. Maybe I need to have people in my life that believe in me and that I know will be there to give me a hand if I fall. And I have. So, if I have people that believe in me I need to be able to also believe in me. I need to trust that I can make the right decisions and that I can do what I set myself to do. I know I need to work on that. I know I still have a lot of work ahead of me. I need to change what's setting me back.